bathroom humor

So much going on in the world - so many heavy issues on everyone's minds. And here I am blogging about - something that happened to me this morning in the public bathroom at my office. (If you want to read some great commentary and thoughts on real issues, I highly recommend 2040 World View. But for now, I'll take it back to the bathroom...)

Our office has a truly top notch group of people who clean the facility. They are like no cleaning staff I have ever encountered. The place is immaculate, and they take their jobs very seriously. And it's a small group - only about 5 or 6 people who clean and maintain the museum (which is not small) and the executive offices, where I am. They are on a first-name basis with everyone, and you almost feel like they would gladly clean out your car for you, if you asked. I've never seen people so happy with what they do - they make me feel guilty for ever complaining about my own job.

This morning I walked down the hall to use the bathroom. As I approached I could see one of the cleaning staff, a woman, was in the doorway with her cart of supplies. I said hello to her and turned around to go back down the hall - as she was clearly in the middle of mopping the floor. She said, "No, no. You can come in." Usually it's sort of an understood thing around here that when you see the cleaning staff cart in the door of one of the bathrooms, you wait until they're done or you go to another bathroom. But she insisted that I come in and use the bathroom. It was clear, however, that she was going to continue with what she was doing.

I should also explain that I have some issues with public bathrooms, and it has nothing to do with the fear of them being unclean. It's more that I really dislike the idea of such a private moment being so public - I prefer a "one-seater" bathroom, if you know what I mean. Multiple stalls bother me. When you add in the possible awkwardness of a co-worker sitting in the next stall, etc. - can't handle it. I want to be alone.

So, I go on in the bathroom. She has the main door propped completely open with her giant cart of supplies, allowing for a clear view of the stalls for all who walk past, which 0f course, I didn't like. I felt confident throngs of people would walk past and recognize my feet under the stall door. Nonetheless, I go in one of the stalls. Within two seconds the cleaning lady is knocking on the door.

"Hey there SNAKE NATION, (she said my first name), you don't have any paper in there, do you?"

Please keep in mind that the office where I am is not that big, the bathrooms are centrally located, and with the main bathroom door propped open, the sound absolutely is projected out into the hall. I might as well have been sitting out in the hall.

"Uh - nope, you're right. Looks like I don't have any paper in here. "

"I'll get you some, baby. Hold on."

She comes back with two rolls of toilet paper that she hands me under the stall door.

"You can just put the other one on that shelf in there, OK?" Also, please note she's sort of yelling at the point.

"OK. Thanks."

When I came out of the bathroom and went back out into the hall - the hall that still had a clear view into the bathroom - my boss and two other people that are senior to me were standing RIGHT THERE talking. I'm sure it's only embarrassing to me, but I felt a little like they had all just basically watched me use the bathroom.

But hey, at least it was clean.